01/05/10 Season 1
As the pool game continues, the men begin to bond. When Jay admits that he could never hit a curveball during his baseball playing days, Javier calls in a favor. He brings Jay and Manny to an empty stadium where they spend the night working on that curveball. The next day, Manny can barely keep his eyes open. Gloria is furious when she finds out why. She knows that Javier has sucked Jay into his exciting lifestyle.
Javier promises to introduce Jay to some of his old pro baseball pals. Of course, the ever-flaky Javier is a no-show leaving a disappointed Jay waiting in the driveway. Gloria and Manny have a "been there, done that" look on their faces as they come out to let Jay know that it'll be okay. We don't doubt that for a second.
Phil is in pain, as he has a kidney stone. The Dunphy family ladies desperately want to call for an ambulance. Sure they want Phil to get the medical attention he needs, but they're also hoping the town's "hot firemen" will answer their cry for help. When the pain gets to be too much, Claire has no choice but to dial 911. Fortunately, she has a few minutes to change into a sexy top and freshen up a bit before the hot firemen arrive.
At the hospital, Phil gets a little loopy from the pain medication. But he's lucid enough to question Claire as to why she got all gussied up for the firemen. She denies doing so. As the pain medication really kicks in, Phil says, "If I never wake up, I'd hate for the last thing you ever said to me to be a lie." Pack your bags, Claire, you're going on a guilt trip!
Claire can't take it anymore. When it looks like Phil has finally drifted off to la-la-land, she leans in and whispers, "I may have gotten dressed up just a tiny bit." She tries to tiptoe out of the room but is stopped in her tracks when she hears Phil say, "I knew it." Busted!
After Phil has his kidney stone removed, Claire tries to apologize for her behavior. Phil is actually over it, but he opts to milk Claire's guilt for all it's worth. It's not worth much once Claire discovers that Phil has spent most of his time in the hospital flirting with the four pretty ladies in the room down the hall. Busted, Part II!
Mitchell wants to Ferberize baby Lily. It's a method of training a child to sleep through the night by letting her cry herself to sleep. Or as Cameron puts it: Torture. Mitchell keeps catching Cameron sneaking into Lily's room to comfort their crying child. It gets to the point where Mitchell attempts to physically hold back Cam as he makes his way toward Lily's room. As you may have guessed, that doesn't end well for Mitchell.
As Mitchell nurses a sprained ankle, he has a heart-to-heart with Cam about Lily. He says, "She can't grow up with one huggy, happy cuddly dad and one frowny, lesson-teachy dad because... guess which one she's gonna ask to walk her down the aisle?" Cam sees his partner's point. He agrees to be the bad cop once in awhile. He also clarifies that they BOTH will walk their daughter down the aisle. That's assuming Mitchell can walk. His ankle is still hurting. Looks like they'll have to call the hot firemen!