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Ep307 I'm Just Not That Into Me

03/12/14 Season 3 TV-PG D, L

STORY 1: When Tessa drags Malik and Lisa to a college party, she meets a male version of herself and becomes enamored. They see eye-to-eye on everything and it’s almost the perfect relationship. 

Tessa: "I didn't even have to look. I knew Mark was talking about Dalia because he and I were two sides of the same coin. In fact, we were the same side of the same coin."

STORY 2: Dallas enlists a matchmaker to set her and Dalia up, but the matchmaker convinces Dallas to date herself and she decides to get back to basics with a new look.

Dallas: "Why do you need wifi to eat?"
Dalia: "I don't like being places where I don't know how many Likes I'm getting. I like to see my Likes and when I can't I don't like it."

Dorothy the Matchmaker: "Do you want a guy with kids?"
Dallas: "If he has them. If not, he shouldn't go out and get any on my account."
Dorothy: "Religious?"
Dallas: "If he believes, I will. If he doesn't, I won't."
Dorothy: "Wait, what?"

Dallas: "Well, that was the worst date ever. I hate me!"

STORY 3: Lisa decides to propose to Malik.

Lisa: "I've decided to ask Malik to marry me."
George: "Is that slang for going to the prom, or something?"
Lisa: "No. That's slang for being life partners, for as long as we both shall live, and beyond, for all eternity, in perpetuity, throughout this universe and any others."

Lisa: "Malik is the Sasha Fierce to my H.O.V.A., and with that said, I want you to be my Kelly Rowland."
Tessa: "You lost me."
Lisa: "I decided to ask Malik to marry me."
Tessa: "Wow! Why?"
Lisa: "Because I liked it. So I'm gonna put a ring on it."

 


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