Finding it more and more difficult to spend time alone and away from Diane’s constant demands, Kate and Pete sneak away for a romantic tryst at the school fundraiser. But when they get trapped, truths come out and Kate reveals she wants to be at the top of Pete’s priority list and for him to stand up to Diane. Meanwhile, Warren and Hillary help Jackie with her online dating profile.
STORY 1: Kate and Pete sneak away for a romantic tryst at Diane's 80's themed school fundraiser, but get stuck in a supply closet.
Kate: “What is it with parents and theme parties?”
Pete: “They’re trying to get back to a time when they were happy.”
Kate: “Shoot me when I’m forty! I mean fifty! I mean, I’ll stop.”
Kate: “Diane, you look great. Who are you?”
Diane: “Oh come on, Kate. You got this.”
Diane: “Hit me with your best shot.”
Kate: “Blanche from ‘The Golden Girls’?”
Diane: “Pat Benatar. And let me guess. [Pete], you’re Billy Idol. And [Kate] you are…”
Kate: “Melanie Griffith, a working girl from the eighties!”
Diane: “Yes, well it’s nice to see you finally dressed up like an adult.”
Kate: “Thank you.”
Kate (locked in the school supply closet): “I’ve got to pee.”
Pete: “How bad?”
Kate: “Somewhere between Bert-on-a-highway bad and Warren-in-a-hot-tub bad.”
Pete: “Oh my God. Help!!!”
STORY 2: Warren and Hillary help Jackie make an online dating video.
Jackie: "There's cow milk in this fridge. I mean, hello? Where's the llama milk? And only one kind of hummus? Oh, of course, Little Lady margaritas. Real classy, Kate."
Warren: "Oh, that's Dad's."
Jackie: "Well either way these things are just loaded with chemicals." [Takes a swig] "Yeah, definitely."
Warren (after Bert repeatedly interrupts Jackie’s video shoot): “This is why I never work with kids. They have NO work ethic!”
Hillary: “I know!”