S1 E08 Thanksgiving is for the Bird-Kersees

21:37 | 11/14/12 | TV-PG | CC

Marty's in-laws usually join the Weavers for Thanksgiving, which no one is fond of. Marty's dad, Dominic, makes him feel inadequate as a provider, and Marty's mom, Theresa, makes Debbie feel like an awful cook – plus she makes ugly sweaters the kids have to wear.

Jackie's sad because when they arrived on Earth, two of her sisters attempted a coup on Larry. They've since been locked up, so every fall, she misses her family. So Jackie invites the Bird-Kersees over for Thanksgiving as a nice gesture. And then Dick and Reggie free Jackie's sisters to make her happy. It's gonna be crowded.

Memorable Quotes:

Marty: What could be more American than eating food to make room for more food? Happy Day Before Thanksgiving, babe!

Marty (re: Jackie stomping out a crop circle): Larry, is this what you do when you're sad?
Larry: No, no. I'm more of a prober.

Amber: I'm sorry I don't like your bad cooking.

Debbie: How are you going to explain the Bird-Kersees to your folks?
Marty: They're better at blending in now, and when my parents see a white guy with a black lady, an Asian kid and a red head, they're not gonna be much into conversation, so…
Debbie: At last, an upside to racism.

Debbie: We live in New Jersey. I drive a minivan. I'm built for fine.

Fairly quickly, things go wrong: Marty's parents and Marty and Debbie are all fighting with each other, separately and together; the Weaver kids are destroying the sweaters; Jackie and Larry and fighting about Jackie's sister; and Dick and Reggie are just sad about all this.

Dick has a nice chat with Theresa, and gets her to go easy on Debbie. As she thaws, Jackie's sisters apologize for trying to overthrow Larry. Even Dominic eventually says he's proud of Marty. The deep-fryer for the turkey catches the backyard on fire, but hey, it's still a victory.

Memorable Quotes:

Abby: Hi Gammy! Hi Pop-pop!
Theresa: Prettiest girl in the family by a mile!
Amber and Debbie: Thanks.

Dominic: Maybe a nice, cool beer could take a tour of my mouth.

Debbie: So…he's your sister?
Jackie's sister: We chose these bodies because we learned the most unique friendships on your Earth are between women of color--
Jackie's other sister: And men of prance.

Debbie: Thanksgiving is hell. The only good parts are the day before, when everything is possible, and the day after when everyone goes home. In between it's just a feast of self-loathing and gluttony with a side of shame.

Larry: Until you two try to overthrow me again.
Jackie's sister: Hooker, please, it was a misunderstanding.
Larry: You two threw me out of a second-story window, shouting "We are going to overthrow you!"

Larry: Have we lost sight of the fact you threw me out of a window? You're sort of burying the lead here.

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